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Fifth Test in Tweets – Day 1

twitterDay 1


@InnoBystander: England saw Aussie weaken their batting considerably, laughed and decided to win with just 9 players…. #cricket #ashes #ragingbunsen

@17thManDiary: Selectors bolster Aussie batting line up for last #Ashes Test. They now bat down to 4.

@mspr1nt: Australia win the toss and elect to have Shane Watson out lbw by lunchtime.

@17thManDiary: Paul the Octopus has done a great job selecting the Aussie team for the Fifth #Ashes Test.

@the_topspin: The Ashes has turned into a contest to see which team can manufacture the longest tail…

@warwicktodd_not: Watto plays the straightening ball with all the finesse of a baby deer on ice

@BoganCricket: Oh fuck, here comes Mr. I’m going to stroll across to the offside and miss the ball completely and be struck plumb in front

@CJ_Coleman: Warner obviously couldn’t find any silicon tape en route to the #Ashes this morning…

@TheCricketGeek: Dave Warner clearly thinks Shane Watson should be opening the batting.

@pavilionopinion: I was sceptical about Lehmann being called a motivational wizard until he managed to inspire Twitter to side with Stuart Broad.

@SaintFrankly: If your car had as many technical flaws as The Wall Street Crash the manufacturer would have a product recall.. #WattoLotto

@Corpse_in_Pads: If a woman woke up next to @BeefyBotham she’d call the police and say, ‘there’s a bloke in my bed pretending he has a brain.’

@SaintFrankly: Time to play #WattoLotto – pick a score between 30-60 that you think The Wall Street Crash will post today.

@NaBaker7: If selection was up to Warney the team would be Faulkner Faulkner Faulkner Clarke Faulkner Faulkner Faulkner Faulkner Faulkner Warne

@jigsactin: Masterclass from England to make sure Australia retain Watson for the second #Ashes leg!

@AltCricket: This is brutal from Shane Watson. It’s like he’s spraying a machine gun at Simon Kerrigan’s hapless Bambi.

@TheCricketGeek: Few points: Debutants rarely do well. 112-1 after losing the toss is ok. Australia are capable of collapsing like cheap garden furniture

@warwicktodd_not: Phil Hughes plays spin with all the confidence of a 15yr old meeting his girlfriend’s father for the first time

@RichieBenaud: Broad bowling like a guy who has been sledged by the opposition coach #Ashes

@warwicktodd_not: Watto is 15 away from a brilliant ton and 5 away from a marvellous 90

@MattKMarsden: And just like that, everyone is Shane Watson’s biggest fan again. #ashes

@thefulltoss: 3 down. England into the tail. Smith’s waft outside off first ball confirms the observation #ashes

@TheCricketGeek: The rev counter really is the cricket coverage equivalent of windscreen wipers on a submarine.

@51allout: 100 for Watson! Meanwhile, my rocking horse has just shat itself. #Ashes

@andy_lee: Our lounge room cheered more for the drop catch than for the 100. That says something… #Ashes

@ZaltzCricket: Cook drops Watson at slip. If not an absolute sitter, it had certainly made itself a cup of tea and was eyeing up an armchair.

@legsidelizzy : Kerrigan on – if I had a cushion I’d be hiding behind it

@ajarrodkimber: Another 50 for the junkyard dog Smith.

@AllOutCricket: Successful review! Truly, it is Watson’s day.

@ajarrodkimber : Is there a shit job in Australia Peter Siddle won’t be asked to do? He’ll be the next PM without putting himself on the ballot.


Day 2 

Read it here


COMING SOON – The 17th Man: The Ashes Diary – Part 1 – England 2013





Ashes File Cover2Coach COver5The Ashes Files 2013. The secret applications file that Cricket Australia assembled when they threw applications open to all comers. Ebook available at amazon now. Works on your ipad with the free kindle app.

Coach2Coach – The story of Australia’s chequered preparation for the 2013 Ashes, as told by The 17th Man. (US/UK)






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