After missing all the drama, excitement and bravado of Tatts’ heroics yesterday, we decided that we’d better watch all the action today. We settled into some appropriate seats in the dressing room, as far away from the door as possible. As usual, it was our aim to NOT have to go onto the field to do any duties that should fall to the 12th man. We know the strategy well. Stay dressed in training strip with no shoes, wear glasses (at The Prof’s recommendation I have a pair with plain glass in them) and sport a pained expression that says “It’s someone else’s job, surely.”
With the England team batting [Ed. Loose use of the term, admittedly] it’s harder to get hold of some of their gourmet food. It only took a little encouragement to the catering staff [Ed. We nearly emptied Wicky’s kit of used items that the junior apprentice chef can flog on ebay] to ensure a steady stream of good eats through the afternoon. It seems the English team have lost their appetites.
A couple of the players are aware of this, so if you ever see them leaning down into the stump and talking, you know what’s going on. Wicky is always sending us cryptic messages, although when he said “make sure the seat is down and the paper is stocked” into the stumps at the Cathesral end about five minutes before lunch, we knew immediately to clear the way.
The host broadcaster is often confused by all this banter, and this is the real reason they have the stump mics turned down.
As the afternoon dragged on, we decided to look around the dressing room for a distraction, and found Puff’s iPad. He’s always messing around with it, and is an avid player of a rather addictive game called Candy Crush. The designers of the game have been quite cunning – when you run out of lives you can buy more and keep playing, or wait until your lives are renewed at the rate of one every half an hour. News reports have suggested the game owners are raking in over $1m a day this way from a “free” game.
“It’s easy to hack that,” said The Prof. “You just put your iPad clock forward and fool the game into giving you some extra lives.”
I tapped the calendar icon. 6 July 2024. It would seem Puff isn’t having much luck with Candy Crush.
There was plenty of verbal and non-verbal heat on the pitch during the last session, and it’s good that the English team aren’t rolling over – besides, the party after a hard win is always better than the party after an easy win, and now we’re looking forward to tomorrow night, big time! In our wildest dreams we dared imagine being 2-0 or 2-1 up AFTER Perth, but it looks like 2-0 up BEFORE Perth.
I have to keep pinching myself. Hoping to keep pinching all the way to a dead rubber at the SCG.
England need 284 runs to win [Ed. Put as many zeros as you like on the end of that number, they won’t be getting it], Australia 4 wickets.
Read The Best of Twitter from Day 4 here.
And in honour of solid eye action from Tatts, Stokes and Prior: Does Everyone Stare? by The Police