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Best of Twitter – 2nd ODI – 17th Jan

The first tweet said it all at the break. England lose ODI’s in Australia when they score 300+. Eion Morgan’s MARVELLOUS CENTURY was headed for the Man of the Match. Surely England could not stuff it from here my English mate said to me as we met a few friends on his boat for a cruise around the harbour, and a bit of cricket watching on the 46 inch TV he has mounted in his ‘harbour-view lounge’. We flicked on the tube with a few beers to watch Australia bat…

@mohanstatsman: Whenever England made 300+ ODI totals in Australia (v SL in 1999 & v Aus 2011) – they lost! Perhaps lucky not to score one today

@LiebCricket: Okay. Which of you idiots reminded Bell that he can bat?
@LiebCricket: That #Bellance partnership was over before I could really get gong with the portmanteau. Annoying

@newman_cricket: Great innings from Morgan gives England a chance even if they lost way in last two overs. Four should be added in break to take it to 300
@brydoncoverdale: Buttler’s shot was six. Law 19 states a fielder’s last point of contact with ground must be within field of play, unless I am misreading it

@worldofBG: Stunning from Jordan !!! England surely can’t stuff this up from here …. oh wait, I forgot Haddin is playing
@LiebCricket: We should have known this was a good batting track when Cook got 22.

I don’t know how this tweet made it in. It is out of context to everything else.

@17thmandiary: An hour old tweet is older than yesterday’s newspaper used to wrap the fish and chips.

@LiebCricket: I see Pup’s taken over Twatto’s dismissal head shake duties.
@bettiwettiwoo: If Shaun Marshmallow’s hamstrings prevent him from running between the wickets, I refuse to see how he can be selected henceforth
@17thManDiary: Aussies toying with England like the local cat used to toy with the three hamsters next door. Catch, release, catch, release, catch, eat.
‏@warwicktodd_not: This is the perfect situation for England to crack and fall apart
@FreedmanDennis: It’s now proven fact that Glenn Maxwell is a doppleganger for @followthebounce

@TheCricketGeek: These two [Faulks and Clint] are there at the end England lose. Need a wicket from somewhere. Most likely place is from some Australian stupidity
@ShootersXI: Clint McKay already owes about 45 runs for his custard bowling during England’s innings

Stokes and Bresnan ‘bowled’ the 49th and 50th overs. The equation: a truck load off 12. And that was it! WE WIN, AGAIN.

@fwildecricket: Faulkner’s innings of two halves:
0 0 1 0 1 1 1 0 0 1 1 0 1 1 0 1 0 0 1 1 1 0 1
6 6 1 1 1 1 2 0 6 1 0 0 2 2 1 0 0 6 6 0 1 4 4 4

@ElishaPearce: #FAULKNERED now has to be a verb in Australian lexicon. #FAULKNERED – devestatingly beaten

@Vitu_E: Christ on a bendybus…
@AltCricket: It’s post-watershed, but still think that this on-air fellatio from the Aussie commentators is a bit much.

@R_J_Joyce: 57 for the 10th Wicket. FIFTY-SEVEN. More than 1/6 of the score, in 6 overs, with the number 11 at one end (crucially, non-striker end).

@wutube: Eoin Morgan must wish he was still with Sydney Thunder
@njhcricket: Australia missed Watson today

@FakeRyanHarris: Who’s Stuart Broad going to talk down from a bridge tonight? #cook

@LittlePiglet72: “I f***ing told you to ball YORKERS, Tim! Yorkers! You complete TWAT!” – A. Cook in dressing room right now

@17thmndiary: Bresnan: I Thought you said bowl a Geordie. Couldn’t understand it, so I bowled normally. I get it now. Bowl a yorkie. Next time. Sorry

@LiebCricket: I hope Cook unleashes all the swears in the post-match interview.

@tickerscricket: Cook rightly talks up brilliance of Faulkner’s innings, but seems unaware that as opposition captain he’s allowed to try and prevent it
@sallyjsara: Poms need to go down to Bondi and sign up a few of their backpackers to play the next match

@fwildecricket: Does this mean Sydney Thunder are better than England? @ThunderBBL

@iamshaunbailey: Another nice reverse victory there by England
@bdv1968: Cooked or Rooted…no matter how you sum it up, the Poms got their Bell rung again tonight #AUSvENG

@tickerscricket: This would never have happened if Broad hadn’t gone to that beach with a lady.
@EssexCricket: Phone lines are now up and running [again] here at The Essex County Ground.

@tickerscricket: Alastair Cook now surely only one setback away from eating an entire Toblerone and driving a Vauxhall Vectra to Dundee in his bare feet

@HarpinoAndo: I bet there is nothing sharper than a wooden spoon in the England dressing room. Oh dear, was that tactless

@17thmandiary: Rules. England got the 6 AND got flogged. Some people need to build a bridge and get over it

A – Australia
S – swept
H – hapless [someone else corrected: Hopeless] E – England
S – sensationally

@FreedmanDennis: England have truly hit rock bottom. @kp24 has become a Collingwood supporter

@cluedont: “I hate it when I clear customs and completely forget what I’ve entered a country for.” Alastair Cook. Cricket is a funny game

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